I have noticed that I am not alone…
There was not even the slightest chance to ever become aware of a less intelligent thought than this. Gripped by this pain I could not perceive anybody else who was struggling just like me with/in pain. Now I am noticing, analyzing, criticizing… “myself”. Yes, that “myself” who used to say it was not selfish but who has learnt to be. That “myself” caught up in the trap of the fight for self. This is the way everybody is, everybody indeed. Nothing new, I reckon. I am fighting for that “perfection” which I have started to bend, to accept it as less perfect… Such a terrible mistake!
That is how everybody is, I have noticed later. And also later I have noticed I have started slipping towards the crowd, without a cease. Maybe I have always been just one among the “crowd”. I am sure of it…but at least my pain was not one in the crowd of pains. What flimsy solace words, what a comic tragedy of my Self… And thus I am coming back to my fight with Perfection, but I need you, I need you all… and I need your Self. I know, you are already out there … in your fight with Perfection. Welcome back…